Preface to

The Truth was Different

One Woman’s Journey Through World War 2

To be published in November, 2026

The Hypothesis

I’m a scientist. As such, I’ve never taken a creative writing class. Indeed, in scientific writing, creativity is positively frowned upon! But when I started writing historical biographies, it seemed good to cross-pollinate and apply the methodology I used in my previous profession. Therefore, in beginning research for The Truth was Different, I first formed a hypothesis.

Although the woman known as Moeder in Unforgivable: Through a Child’s Eyes and Rita in The Truth was Different, seemed cold-hearted and cruel, she believed she was rational and her actions were justified. Possibly, even viewed herself as loving and kind.

Background Reading

To properly evaluate a theory, scientists begin by reading and analyzing the peer-reviewed literature. So, I crawled into Rita’s mind and life by acquiring and studying the books she wrote. Her five out-of-print books were written in Dutch, which brought its own set of challenges. But how rewarding! As I read, I noticed that some passages went into far greater depth than others, and several incidents appeared in more than one book. I quickly realized that Rita, like most authors, was drawing from lived experience.

Autobiographical Books

 De Werkelijkheid was Anders (The Reality was Different) is Rita’s memoir, a work of self-declared nonfiction. In it, Rita recounted her experiences during World War 2 in the Netherlands. She changed all the names, many relationship details, and some of the places, but reported her actions, thoughts, and feelings in a devastatingly honest and courageous fashion. Although I don’t know why she attempted to disguise the characters, from the title, I surmised that the purpose of De Werkelijkheid was Anders was to vindicate, or at least explain, her actions, which she obviously thought were viewed critically or unsympathetically by others..

De Gesloten Deur (The Locked Door) purports to be a fictional account of a businessman who has an extramarital affair with someone not much older than his daughter. Rita’s family history led me to suspect that this book contained autobiographical elements. After careful analysis, I noticed that the businessman shared Rita’s father’s birthday and physical attributes. The fictional wife’s name was remarkably similar to Rita’s mother’s; her behavior was identical to what was reported about her elsewhere. The mistress shared her initials with Rita’s father’s second wife. And those relatives who knew Rita and her brother, Hans, told me that the personalities of the businessman’s teenage children were virtually identical to those of Rita and Hans. I concluded that incidents from Rita’s childhood inspired parts of De Gesloten Deur.

Other Books

In Zij (She), Rita detailed the gradual descent of the main character, Annette, from innocence into unethical behavior. Although this book was categorized as fiction, Annette’s struggles with guilt and homesickness were remarkably vivid, and I surmised that they mirrored some of Rita’s real feelings. The story also included a scene in which Annette helps a friend through the aftermath of a surgical procedure and an account of her grief when another friend goes to jail. Both incidents had parallels in Rita’s life. My analysis revealed that Zij contained much that was drawn from Rita’s life.

 Overspel (Adultery) and De Sterkste en Andere Verhalen (The Strongest and Other Tales), while more fictional, also contain nuggets that revealed Rita’s experiences, feelings, and thoughts. In Overspel, the mother lamented that she’d been more successful in her professional life than with her child, who really didn’t like her. Rita was observant, analytical, and brilliant. She doubtless knew what her kids thought of her. Both books contained vivid portrayals of extreme grief and depression. Since Rita’s life was full of unbearable pain, I deduced that what she wrote in these books reflected the emotions she hid from the world.

Research

After this thorough analysis, I elucidated the actual identities of the many characters who appeared in De Werkelijkheid was Anders and De Gesloten Deur. Perhaps one could say that this was the equivalent of trying to replicate the results of others. For example, who were the relatives with three daughters, the youngest of whom was Rita’s best friend? Just who was the family that Rita’s husband lodged with? Who were the people that Rita considered to be her substitute parents? When and how did Rita’s Jewish relatives die? Who betrayed them? Who were her bosses, and where did she work? For this, MyHeritage.com, Internet searches, and conversations with people in various relevant Facebook groups proved extremely helpful. But why, oh why, did so many of my relatives name their children after their parents, grandparents, aunts, uncles, and deceased siblings? After much hair-pulling and head-spinning, I not only identified most of the people in Rita’s life, but also found where many of them resided.

Interviews

At the same time, I conferred with other scientists—ahem—those who knew Rita more intimately than I. Her two daughters-in-law, Hetti Evenblij and Meta Evenbly, were very helpful, as was my cousin, Cilia Evenblij. One of my favorite repeat encounters was with Irma O’Connor-Wallig, my father’s cousin. She never met Rita, but gave me a great deal of valuable information, some fascinating photographs, and many historical documents. I also thoroughly enjoyed meeting and corresponding extensively with Rosita Olivier, distant cousin and genealogist extraordinaire. The latter two women uncovered much of the information that in my humble opinion elevated this book from good to great.

Historical Research

Rita was born in 1908 in a place and during a time very distant from here and now. She saw the Great War, the 1918 Influenza pandemic, and World War 2 in the Netherlands. She lived while the East Indies were colonized by the Dutch and the Congo by Belgium. She witnessed the advent of the domestic use of electricity, widespread travel via automobiles and airplanes, and even the convenience of the telephone. Suffice it to say that much historical research was needed, and this scientist spent many hours learning history so that this book would both be accurate and would come to life for my readers.

So Much Editing

Those who’ve persisted in reading this far may have noticed that I conducted most of my investigations before I wrote a word of the story. That’s pretty consistent with what should happen in science. Competent scientists don’t write up their results before finishing their research! Even with waiting, when I finally began writing, and indeed, after I thought this book was complete, more information came to light. This also happens in science, and, like I did as a scientist, when I encountered something surprising, I conducted further research, sometimes leading to extensive rewrites. In the end, after numerous edits, help from beta readers and others, and solicitation of prepublication reviews (scientists call that peer review), The Truth was Different was ready.

The Surprise

The surprise for me was that, as I got to know Rita, I went from being slightly ashamed of being related to her to seeing much that I have in common with her. Even more, I became grateful and proud to be this honest and courageous woman’s granddaughter.

Was she rational? Yes, definitely. Were her actions justified? Probably most were. Did she view herself as loving and kind? Possibly. Did I prove my hypothesis? Well, good scientists never claim that they’ve proven anything. Regardless, there’s no doubt in my mind that the truth was different.